How To Make Peace With Yourself and Your Loved One because the everyday struggles caring for an aging parent can be daunting at times.
Good Day my sweet Caregivers,
Can I be upfront with you today? Will that be OK? You need to make peace with yourself.
A friend that I met while taking a business course together a few months ago asked if she could do an interview with me. WOW what an honor it was but at the same time I didn’t feel at liberty to open my soul to her and maybe that was wrong but at the time I just wasn’t able to. I didn’t know how to make peace with myself. You can click the image below if you would like to read the article.
I don’t like talking about myself much but decided that maybe just maybe my story might help just one Caregiver or maybe you know a Caregiver who needs to know they aren’t alone in their feelings and that they can make peace with yourself.
This has not been one of my best summers. Nothing really bad happened, I guess my body, my emotions, and my thoughts just took a toll on me for the last few months. I fought it with everything I had but it wasn’t enough. Making peace with myself was not happening at least for now.
A couple of years ago I had very high blood pressure and also depression. My doctors got it all under control but I felt like such a failure having to be put on medication. I did feel a whole lot better physically but mentally and emotionally I fought it big time.
SOOO….after a while I went off of them and did really good. UNTIL….this summer and it all came back to rob me of my life again. I started having mom’s visiting nurse check my blood pressure on her scheduled days to see mom and of course my blood pressure was through the roof again and I felt very very depressed.
The fun just seems to disappear out of your life when you’re a Family Caregiver. There just isn’t time to have fun and the family member you are caring for usually isn’t up to having fun and they don’t like it when you, their caregiver goes off for a few hours to have a little fun so you just give it up and find a way to let it go and make peace with myself for the feelings that I have.
I finally decided after weeks of being off my wonkers to get back on my medicine and I’m starting to see a flicker of light at the end of the tunnel. Not fully there YET but I do think I’m on my way. Look, we love our aging parents and we’re honored that we can keep them home and out of the nursing home but our lives and our families lives are effected also. Not just our aging parent(s) life. Sometimes it’s very hard to make peace with yourself over this life transformation.
I felt weak because I fell into depression! I felt like a bad daughter because I couldn’t stay strong and jubilant while I’m caring for mom but being a Caregiver is a job that’s not only emotionally, physically and mentally exhausting but it is also psychologically exhausting at the same time. Now are you with me here?
It’ll be a very long road ahead if you don’t make peace with yourself.
I started doing more research and what I found was another caregiver talked about high blood pressure, over eating and depression just like I had and it really helped knowing that it WASN’T me. Do you know what I mean?
The more I hear other caregiver stories and listen with my heart and see that we all have similiar journeys I’m more able to make peace within my own life. It’s still hard and I’m still battling it down inside but at least I can look at what I’m doing and know that it’s the right place for me.
We take everything so personal as caregivers and it’s very hard NOT to. I’m just like you, just a daughter caring for her aging mother. I’m not a professional anything, I want to share my life and be here to help YOU. I want you to know that you’re not alone and I am still learning how to make peace within myself and you will have to make peace with yourself too in order to be the best caregiver to your parent. We can do this together.
Make it a GREAT day!
I wish you well,
Donna Harris
